“In my end is my beginning.”
It was good and hard and now it is done. I set out to do CornDiet for two reasons: I wanted to see my poop and I wanted to start my crossing things off my Bucket List.
People incredulously asked us why we did this to ourselves, but to Callen and I the answer was obvious. No tomorrow is guaranteed, and if you really want to do something—do it right now.
Sure , it was ridiculous. Not to mention incredibly immature. But it’s the change in thinking that is important. Is your cereal worth more than your ambition? If you really want to do something, are you going to balk because you’ll lose a few hours sleep over it?
If you answered yes, you’re not going to get much done in your life, nothing that demands sacrifice at least. And the best things in life demand sacrifice.
As what you desire grows more grand, what you’ll have to sacrifice gets larger too. Want to poop corn? Give up food and abdominal comfort. Want to visit Pamplona and Petra? Get a job and save up.
Want to change the world? Get started. And don’t forget laxatives.
Guys, the end is near
I can’t take too much more corn; my partner has bowed out; I’m very weak and tired. SO MARK, WHY DO YOU GO ON??
Why did Sir Edmund Hillary climb Mount Everest? Because it was there.
My poo’s are getting closer and closer to the ideal, and with another corn breakfast in my belly there is a chance that I might soon produce the The Sorcerer’s Stones
I can tell you emphatically: I am not eating another corn breakfast. I cannot say whether or not I will eat corn through the rest of the day; and heck, there is even a forecast for more laxatives on the horizon. But at this time tomorrow I will be eating a HUMAN BREAKFAST. (breakfast typical for humans, not OF humans)
Also, go to church! Happy Ash Wednesday!
(B.T.W. I STILL haven’t showered and it’s actually starting to bother Sean now. I can’t tell if I stink, so maybe it’s the thought of me being dirty that gets him. If that’s the case, Sean needs to quit having DIRTY THOUGHTS
I finally dropped another deuce. It wasn’t exactly what I wanted, so I’m going to keep going on the CornDiet. The laxatives I took should just now be taking affect, and there is nothing in my system but corn.
I don’t know how much longer I’ll go, but I’m at the point where every little bit I go now is uncharted territory, and that motivates me to stay faithful to corn.
I’ll keep you updated because I expect more Dumpage tonight
Well everyone its been real, it’s been fun. To no extent has it been really fun, but I have enjoyed myself on this corntacular journey. My body is quite upset, and I have decided to return to normal eating habits. Remember: “It’s not just corn, it’s a way of life.” - Callen Hearne
Laxatives kicked in a little early: Approx 5:30 after taking them around 2 pm. Definitely a considerable amount of Corn in here! To my dismay, I theorize that the oily substance obscuring the rest of the dump at the bottom of the toilet is likely oil from the popcorn.
Regardless, this is some Grade A Feces
Ladies and Gentlemen, we have the first very close perfect poo
The problem remains: we do not know what a perfect final product will look like a.k.a. how much will it look like normal corn. So, this may be the perfect poo; we do not know. Until we know more, we are pretty satisfied with this
Stay posted for more
Breakthrough! Okay so it’s difficult to tell from the photo but during this dump (3:50 pm Day 2) I could actually feel that I was pooping corn! All this hard work is finally starting to pay off! Can’t wait to see the results once the laxatives kick in. ETA 7:28 pm
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